Personal Outlook

Cycled Behavior

When was the moment that you realized the people around you were toxic and you had to make the decision to stop talking to them? How eye opening was that moment?

I feel that many people realize these things at different points in their lives. The longer you stay in destructive friendships usually has a lot to do with your relationship with your family. They create a model and lay down the rules for how each of your relationships must go. So sometimes it feels comfortable to hang out around people who act similar to your family members because you know exactly how to behave in those social interactions.

I titled this post Cycled Behavior because I was pondering the types of people who fall into these cycles. I’m sure we all know that one person who realizes each week that their friends are bad people only to make up with them a week later and continue to run through this cycle several times a year forever. Why do people behave this way?

When something life changing happens to you and you make a distinct decision to change your life and stop letting others bring you down, you would think people would actually stick to it. For those of you who have made these decisions and actually stuck to it, what was that feeling? How did you know that would be the final time? What social awkwardness did you have to go through to make it happen?

I’ve written a few posts on here about friendship and my unwillingness to cater to others. I’m not completely cold hearted and I do give people multiple chances, but I’ve had so many experiences where I had to say “no” and stick by that. Even when they try manipulate you into forgiving them or doing what they want. I have stuck by the decision when I’m serious about it. I have a hard time understanding how people can say it multiple times but then fall into the same cycle.

I don’t look down on these people, but it makes me really wonder what they actually feel and what is real to them. It starts to get confusing on what are lies and what is truth in their complaints about the other person or people. What makes them stay? Many people would say insecurity in oneself, but sometimes I wonder if they really just don’t care either way and if it’s just comfortable for them to stick to these patterns.

Another Commoner

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